MEET THE TEAM – Shirley Greenfield
What is your favourite thing about being a therapist?
I strongly believe in the importance of the therapeutic alliance—the trust between a client and therapist that is required to make progress and facilitate change. Hence, my favourite part about being a therapist is forming this type of unique relationship based on empathy and a non-judgmental approach. Witnessing positive changes unfold in a client’s life is profoundly rewarding, especially as their relationships with themselves, partners, children, and others around them evolve and flourish.
Additionally, I deeply appreciate the privilege that clients grant me by allowing me to support them during their most challenging times in life. Whether they are dealing with fertility difficulties, facing separation, coping with illness, or enduring the loss of a loved one, I hope to provide a safe space where they can process their emotions, confront difficult feelings, and find solace. My goal is to help clients navigate these trying times without the need to repress or ignore their emotions.
What is the most common/frequent issue people are bringing to therapy?
In my experience as a couple and individual therapist, one of the most common issues that people bring to therapy is related to challenging relationships. lack of trust, feeling insecure, growing tensions, or a feeling of growing apart from your partner, issues around lack of intimacy create stress and anxiety and a more general feeling of unhappiness that often leads people to seek help.
However, it’s important to note that while difficult relationships are prevalent, every individual’s and couple’s situation is unique and different. I believe my role as a therapist is to create a safe and supportive space where clients can explore their specific concerns, whether they are related to stress, anxiety, relationships, self-esteem, grief, or any other aspect of their lives. Each person’s and couple’s journey is different, and my approach is tailored to meet their needs. By fostering a strong therapeutic alliance, I help clients navigate their challenges, understand themselves and their partners better, and work towards positive change in their lives.
Is therapy an art or a science?
The question of whether therapy is an art or a science is an interesting one, and it often sparks debates among professionals in the field. I guess there is so much in common between art and science that it is a unique blend of both. Both art and science require great amounts of creativity, as there is a desire to create a genuine creation, something new that will help people and will represent something meaningful for them. I believe that this is also the essence of therapy: to combine a more scientific understanding of human behaviour, psychology, and evidence-based therapeutic techniques with the ability to use that in a creative way, building a genuine, empathetic, and therapeutic relationship with clients to facilitate something new happening—a new understanding, a new way of observing and thinking about things, and a new kind of relationship forming.
The art of therapy lies in the therapist’s capacity to empathise, communicate effectively, and establish a strong therapeutic alliance. It’s about helping clients explore their inner world, express their thoughts and feelings, and work collaboratively towards positive change.
What do you do for your own self-care?
Going to my own therapist every week for many years now has helped me a lot to feel supported and understood and I can’t see my life without it. In addition, being in nature—appreciating the seasonal changes, the beauty, and smelling the fresh air—always makes me feel immediately renewed. I feel blessed to live next to a big park, but wherever I go, the first thing I will look for is some greenery around me. I find that feeling gratitude and writing it down every day helps me stay positive and connected to myself, even on the more challenging days.
What is the book/movie that comforts you?
“A man search for a meaning” is an old favourite one. More recently I have read “Lily’s Promise: How I Survived Auschwitz and Found the Strength to Live” both books although tremendously sad and full of trauma and loss can also bring a sense of happiness and hope. Don’t read it without a tissue next to you!
I also enjoy reading poetry and enjoy coming back to some of my favourite ones from time to time. I would highly recommend any of Jane Hirshfield’s books.
Children’s books are my absolute pleasure, especially looking at the drawings. I often find that even though they are short, they can have a very meaningful message, like for example, in the book “How to Heal a Broken Wing.”
What’s in a joke?
A joke is a way to release tension and find the funny side in different situations. However, in my practice, I find that a lot of the time, the clients who make funny or sarcastic comments hold inside their pain and sadness that they wish would be understood.
Tell us one:
How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb has to really want to change. 😊